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How about some Reds and Blues ?

Posted by Behind Bars on 2011-April-18 09:54:05, Monday
In reply to Let’s flesh it out with some colour then. posted by Long Brown Cloud on 2011-April-18 07:11:47, Monday

The best I can nail to down to in relation to that "distinctly unpleasant feeling" is this:-

The issue of naked pictures of me forming part of a large internet porn collection was never considered by me as a child. Simply because as a child 1) There was no internet therefore the likelihood of any picture being widely distributed was pretty much nil
2) As a child I had little knowledge of pedophilia. I knew of course that as I grew in age and the boys I was attracted too ages were not increasing and that society hated and reviled people like me but really that's about as far as it went. The idea of adults using child pornography really didn't enter my consciousness until I was in my twenties, so unfortunately from a child's perspective I cannot answer that question.
Of course I can postulate what I might have thought as you have, but it is always going to be with the "filter" of adultness tainted by our own present desires and life experiences and I'm not convinced as to the validity of any outcome of such musings.

Thinking as an adult about the issue of naked pictures of me as a child widely circulating around the internet giving me a "distinctly unpleasant feeling" relates yes of course as I've mentioned down to a lack of control of who see and what happens to that image and the context of where that photo might turn up. This is without a doubt something which is fueled by the loss of childhood naivety, social indoctrination, peer pressure and life experience.

I'll put it into a real life scenario to help explain.
A few years ago now I was on holiday with members of my family at a very large European naturist resort. Whilst there we met up with some other people from the same country as us. One member was not a celebrity as such but he held a job down which meant that he moved in very high circles at times and very occasionally appeared on TV. He had been like I brought up a naturist from a young age and was totally comfortable being naked within that context and surroundings. We hit if off and exchanged Face Book addys as you do. Later that year I had cause to send him a E-Mail rather than put a comment of his very public FB page. I entitled my E-Mail " I saw you naked in *********" (** being the name of the resort) For me without thinking about it, it seemed a harmless bit of fun. He however did not recognized my E-Mail address to start with and until he realized who it was, he was shitting bricks (slightly more than a distinctly unpleasant feeling).
It wasn't because he thought being a naturist was wrong, or indeed being seen naked was wrong it was the thought that someone who he did not know, had seen him naked in a picture from that site and knew he attended naturist sites. Suddenly he was not in control of the information about that bit of his personal life.
As soon as he found out it was me he was fine. You see at naturist sites / events you give quasi consent by the fact of taking your clothes off for other naturists at that site at that time to see you naked. You don't consent to unnamed and unknown individuals with differing motives other than enjoying naturism being privy to your naked body, pictures of it or that aspect of your life.

Further more and in addition to the above I have to say that on a very personal level I do have some issues with some aspects pedophilia. In the next breath I would also say I significantly doubt you would find many here or whom would classify themselves as pedophiles who would lovingly embrace all aspects of pedophilia from ages 0 to 18 in all it guises and tastes.
Of course we don't condemn or criticize each other generally when someone else admits to having a desire which you cannot understand and find slightly horrifying because as pedophiles we have almost an unwritten law that to do so, is socially not acceptable within our cohort. But that cannot dispel those feelings which come automatically which are based on your own personal set of morals.
My "issues" are based on our own personal morals of what's right and wrong, what's acceptable and what isn't. What can be done in the name of love and sex and what shouldn't. For me the issues that cause me the most trouble are the ones relating to consent and where it is a reasonable expectation that a degree of informed consent exists. This is where is directly impinges on the issue of photographs and what a person might reasonable consent to if they were informed about the use and distribution of their image, naked or not.



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