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I have to disagree a little with 'Martir,' because what you're describing here is a regular fetish and anyone can have one of those, whether they were raised in a repressive environment or not. Fetishes involving vulnerability, such as being tied up, are very common, because vulnerability brings us closer to our original, not-so-much-in-control self, and that's where our sexuality resides. For people who do conventional sex, getting naked with someone and feeling their body surface and juices is vulnerable enough to get them hot; for other people, though, they may want to be tied up, spanked, peed on, verbally humiliated, etc. It's just a fixed symbol of primal vulnerability in your mind. There may or may not be some early event you can remember when you were a young child that this all relates to - maybe a little friend farting in your face, maybe something less obviously connected. Anyways, you're a hebephile / young teen lover with a particular vulnerability fetish. It's all part of God's biodiversity. |