If a BL is going to seek sex with a boy, he should: (1) Be extremely deferential, attempting to ascertain the boy's preferences and fulfill them. (2) Be extremely assertive, knowing from experience what the boy wants but is not ready to acknowledge. (3) Something in between. (4) None of the above. The correct answer is (4) None of the above. From this abstract description, it is not possible to determine what is best for a particular boy and older boy or man. The problem with (3) is that it assumes neither (1) nor (2) can be correct, that each is too "extreme." But this is not true. Every case is different from every other, and nothing is inherently too "extreme" for any individual couple. It is not our task to decide what approach is best for any age disparate partners. They can do that for themselves. Our task is to support their exercise of agency against potential parental, institutional, or state interference. hugzu ;-p |