Maybe try and love him for what he was...

... like you would care about the son of a good friend who passed away. Though bodies change a lot, there are often a few things that remain almost identical even many years later: the eyes, a smile... you can try and focus on that when you see your nephew. I am currently in a relationship with a boy who was halfway to being my young friend, and who I share a quite special relationship with (sorry for remaining vague, I prefer not to explain it here). He knows that I like younger boys, and he's kind enough to send me (innocent) pictures of his younger self or other boys. But I wouldn't recommend to share that much with a boy without some very good reasons. Let's say I've met him in particular circumstances which made it unavoidable that he would know that side of me. I also have a nephew who still looks attractive to me, but less and less, and at a fast rate now I'm afraid. To me, I don't think it is such a big issue, but that's also because I have some other younger boys in my life (and we lived far apart as well, so he never was all my life to begin with, except during the few happy days and weeks we could spend together). It certainly helps a lot not to have only one boy in a BL's life. Maybe you could volunteer in something related to kids? Sports, summer camps, ... whatever floats your boat. You may not get a young friend out of it, but it could still help you manage the transition. Eventually, I'm afraid the only solution is acceptance. Nothing lasts forever. Don't ruminate too much about it, as it will only makes you feel more miserable. Accept your sadness, embrace the nostalgia that comes with it, and make your best to deal with what you have now. I'm sure that there is still some place for your nephew in your heart, even if it isn't the same place anymore. No need to tell him that, it would only hurt him I guess. Try to pull yourself together a bit, but don’t go overboard either. Let time do its work. As in the old legend of the king's ring: "That too shall pass." Lots of happy boys to you, FF mi lon. mute mije lili kin li lon. o sina kute e mi, mi ala wile, pilin pona mi li anpa e pilin ante.