Utopia or Distopia?

As Neville Goddard suggests "everyone is you pushed out" or EOIYPO for short, nobody else exists, and they kick you in the shins or kiss you according to what you imagine yourself to be, with what amount of confidence you believe in yourself, in your imagination, any doubt arising will put a spanner in the works and your plans will probably backfire! That was back in about 1967, so applied to boy-lovers that's a pretty tragic idea, for boys would just be avatars, nice looking zombies, truly AI consciousnessless creations following prompts that you feed your imagination, oh, god have mercy, that's so soul destroying. So we'll chuck that idea into the bin where it belongs. Even if it were true. I'd rather be kicked in the shins by a real boy than kissed by a mirage. Or would I? Perhaps you could live out your fantasies, these "mirages" would be absolutely the finest actors, you really couldn't tell them from real boys. I mean think of dreams, what creates those? And when you believe with all your heart you wake up in a real world what if it were just another dream with higher production values? I've thought about this and the only escape is the belief that everybody is born into this dreamer's existence, you hear about ideas that all is one, and non-duality, and the illusion of separation, so your consciousness the thing you call "I" is actually shared by everybody that ever has been or was part of the entire infinite universe and there are no blind spots. Everything exists as this "I". You weren't just an impossible accident of birth, you were inevitable always have existed and always will. Science is like the menu as opposed to the meal. The map as opposed to the territory. And it's all a humongous AI model with infinite "VRAM". Metaphorically speaking. So this I that we all identify with, is dreaming of this world and this universe and every creature in it including other people. So though they may be apparitions they exist as the universal I, I mean who doesn't? The love we feel is real, and the love from other people is real in the form of god's love for us and other people. Sure the I suffers and it would be a pointless existence if it didn't, but it loves and plays and works and overcomes, and the meaning of life is the meaning of living. Beauty, art, literature, all forms of learning. entertainment, company, creation, there is no lack. And the age old question of how could an all powerful all loving god allow such horrible suffering becomes meaningless. It is called the course of nature, and nature is a dream pretending to be real. For the sake of a seemingly real life. Then again, maybe this whole idea does belong in the bin!