Is drinking kids' sperm a crime?

I was precisely wondering about that. I mean, there is no nudity, no physical contact, no sex talk, nothing. The kids could ship it to you by regular courier. You could even argue that you work in a lab and you test sperm quality. Let's say you have the skill of knowing sperm quality by its taste. You could even go viral on TV with such a skill. Or that you take it only for medicinal purposes. Or whatever. This is also extendable to piss, spit, and other fetishes, if you are into that. And, why not?, scat. Farts are technically more complicated, but hey!, with enough patience it is doable. And don't forget the items: dirty clothes, used socks, smelly underwear, baskets. The items would be easy to cover: a laundry service. You give them back sparkling clean, et voilà. There are many many possibilities. By the way, if you go to court because of that, it would be undeniably hilarious. "Mr. Jones, is it you who smelled those dirty socks of... Puah! This really stinks! Take that out of here!" The bailiff goes like, "Sorry, your honor. This smell comes from my arm pits. I didn't shower today" And then the judge takes a jar and goes like, "Okay, okay, let's get focused on the matter. Mr. Jones, look at this piece of shit. Can you recognise it?" And Jones goes like, "I beg you pardon?" "Can you recognise it or not?" "Honestly, I don't know what to say, they all look the same to me, more or less. I was warned about the weirdness of American trials, but seriously, this is too much. Way too much." "I'm asking you, Mr. Jones! Don't get me angry! Answer the question! This is very serious!" And the kid goes like, "Mister judge, do you want me to fart? Maybe this will help clear the air..." No, seriously. If anyone has some reliable information about whether this is legal or not, it would we nice to know. Just curious.