Oh my god, Butch, I can't even describe how obsessed with MJ I was when I was little. I dreamed about him, wrote stories about meeting him, drew pictures, danced around, sang, everything. I wrote him several letters, throughout the 90s, telling him all about how much I loved him and worshipped him and how I wanted to visit him, but I was too scared to ever mail them out. He was seriously my hero though. I probably would have died for him. A lot of children loved him and continued to love him. I was definitely one of those kids. When the History album came out and I heard that song, You Are Not Alone, it felt like if was written for me. My classmates used to make fun of me, telling me he's a baby raper and all that crap. I never believed he did anything impure or even sexual, and I still don't. That's one of the only things I think I ever had faith in, as a child. I didn't believe in magic of anything like that, I was very scientific about everything, but if there ever was a true magician who used real magic, to me, it was Michael Jackson. This will sound insanely egotistical, so I should probably just shut the hell up while I'm ahead, but it's on my mind. When I think of how I was and look at old pictures of myself, I was a boylover's dream. I was adorable and clever and would jump into the arms of complete strangers on occasion because I just loved everything and everyone at that time. If I met myself at that age, now, I would have a good time, I think. I don't mean in a dirty sex way either. I'd just have fun batting ideas about life back and fourth with him, experiencing his cleverness, and laughing at his insane MJ worship and how he ripped his clothes and gloves and did all this stupid stuff to try to look like MJ, and I would smile at it and be like, wow what a strange creature I was... |