i love this post of yours

we have so many parallels. only, I DID attempt suicide. many times. you may not believe in a deity or an afterlife, but for some reason, I have obviously survived every try I made. I Do believe that we all have a purpose in life, and that we should live each day to answer that call to service of our fellow man. their are people here in my building that call me an angel. it makes me feel good. and in my head, I hear a little bell ringing. I may have my wings before I even get out of this life. not that I have been a good person all of my life, but ever since my last failed attempt (hanging) I have had time to reflect, and I think that I have not fulfilled my mission here on earth. I am still not really a religious person, I don't go to church, my bible has an inch of dust on it, I can't quote scripture, and I don't go around acting pious. all of that is for someone else. but I do believe in a higher power. not the one described in the Bible, well, maybe in the first book. about the creation and God being so illusive, like the wind in the air. but more like the sun that gives its' warmth and energy. my god could never be a god of destruction.