and i wish i had the answer the answer depends on so many factors: age of the boy, his maturity, the relationship up to that point and its length, what the boy says/does, how he says/does it, etc as you said, the laundry list here would go on and on so i have no answer for you and to tell you the truth there is no objective answer! such situations and the conditions for them remain subjective! at the same time that this subjectivity exists seemingly without an ultimate authority to judge the rightness or wrongness of the behavior there are certain situations that boylover x would behave one way while boylover y behaves another way so who is right? given our current climate and political situation the one who avoids sex is more than likely doing right - sparing the boy embarrassment and trauma and guilt if the relationship is found out....and the same even if it is not (e.g. the "reconceptualization" literature you put forward)! but the ultimate judgement rests on the bl to act in the best interest of all parties involved, not just his own hard dick sorry i cannot be more specific the issue is too complicated to give you a straighter answer |